Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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