Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
