We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
