All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize