Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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