Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
