Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
