he shaved USA in his pubs
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
