I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
