And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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