I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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