I want to make a zoo with you.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
ugly people sure do ruin things
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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