Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
