I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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