I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
