Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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