I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
