How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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