I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
