Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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