I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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