Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
wow bdsm is so cute
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
