i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Randomize
