Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize