I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
