drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
