At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
