Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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