On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
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