am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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