its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
