Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Randomize
