I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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