I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
