ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize