I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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