You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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