i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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