she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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