i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
