Having a random hookup so left but love u
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
