? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
