love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
