Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
