If i come over, it means nothing
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize