ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
