Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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