No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
