WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
