I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
