he puts the penis in happiness.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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