If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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