Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
