It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
